


What Death Has Touched

by idhrenn



Category: Carmilla (Web Series)
Genre: Angst, Character Death, F/F, I made myself sad while writing this, No happy ending!, Sad, You Have Been Warned, post-Episode 34
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-30
Updated: 2014-11-30
Packaged: 2018-02-27 11:54:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 526
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2692013
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/idhrenn/pseuds/idhrenn
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Post-Episode 34 so...you know! Laura is grieving her stupid vampire just like us. And she might be in denial, just like we are..</p>
            </blockquote>





	What Death Has Touched

**Author's Note:**

> Warning: This is not a fix-it. It's not happy. It's sad and tragic and I am sorry.  
> But I am suffering, so all of you have to be part of it, too. 
> 
> The title is inspired by the poem "Tis a Fearful Thing".

**_It is a fearful thing_ **

**_to love what death can touch._ **

_Carmilla's dead_.

It had been 3 days, 16 hours and exactly 45 minutes since Laura had said those words out loud and she still couldn't believe it.

Carmilla could not be dead. She had already been dead when she had made that stupid and brave decision. She was a vampire for god's sake!! A completely stupid and insanely heroic vampire who had saved them all…who had left Laura alone.

Without her.

She was really; truly gone this time and she would never come back.

Laura clutched her pillow tightly to her chest. That _stupid_ yellow pillow that Carmilla had loved to steal when she wasn't looking. Hell, even when she _was_ looking…and now she never would again.

That thought alone was enough to make Laura cry even harder and she was thankful that she was alone. Nobody had been in her room since the day she told the world what a hero Carmilla really was. Even though she insisted that she wasn't, Laura knew better and the others did too.

LaFontaine, Perry, yes even Danny, all of them knew what Carmilla did for them.

And what Laura lost.

" _You stupid, idiotic vampire, you were supposed to be the one who survived this and not me_!" Laura screamed in her mind, while burrowing her face in the pillow. It even smelled like Carmilla and that made her cry all over again.

" _Don't start expecting heroic vampire crap from me, cupcake."_ Carmilla had said to her and meant it, but when the time came she did it anyway.

She did it for Laura.

And now she was gone.

And Laura was left with all the words unspoken and the memories haunting her. "Go away Carmilla." she had said "Go run and hide. We're done."

And Carmilla had gone and she came back, like her knight in shining armor, golden blade in hand and a sassy line on her lips.

_"You know, I am really starting to hate this heroic vampire crap."_ she had told her, with tears in her eyes and her trademark smirk on her beautiful face. Typical Carmilla, she just _had_ to make an entrance with a line like that. Only Carmilla Karnstein would.

The memory makes Laura smile before she remembered that she would never hear such a line from her vampire because her vampire did not exist anymore.

So, all Laura could do was curl up into a tight ball on Carmilla's bed, the three words she didn't say but should have said instead of _you know_ racing through her mind.

_I love you._

_Please come back, you idiot so I can tell you that over and over again until it's carved into the inside of your brain._ Laura regretted not telling her vampire about her feelings for her because Carmilla died thinking Laura hated her.

_Carmilla, please…I didn't mean it, I never did._

_You have to know that. I was angry and hurt but I never hated you._

_I love you._

_I'll always love you._

 

**_Tis a human thing, love,_ **

**_a holy thing,_ **

**_to love_ **

**_what death has touched._ **

**Author's Note:**

> I'M SORRY! I'M SORRY! I'M SORRY!!!
> 
> I really am sorry...I am going to go hide in a lonely corner now..
> 
> MEA CULPA!


End file.
